The Audacity of Flying Cars

President Obama

Two years later.

Everybody’s already mad at you

They’re mad that you didn’t do what you said would

mad you did what you said you would

Some people are mad about things you never said you’d do

We just liked you so much

We figured you liked everything we liked

Even if you didn’t say you did

And I like you

So Take a tip from your predecessor

When you find yourself having to solve a whole mess of problems

Don’t solve, distract

While we worried about losing our civil liberties

He lowered  taxes

While we worried about global warming

He promised a moon base

While we worried about being attacked by terrorists from Afghanistan

He invaded Iraq

Now since we seem to be worried about…everything

We gotta think big

So here it is, ready?

Flying Cars

Think about it , Awesome right?

 

You wanna talk about improving our world image ?

When you enter U.N. meetings

Other nations will have no choice

But to look upon you in shock and awe

As you strut by Iran

Ahmadinejad will lean over to the ayatollah and say

“there he goes, dudes got a flying limo

But in Farcee

 

You want to be leader in the auto industry again?

Let’s ship a fleet of those bad boys to Japan

Driven by some of the most road ragin’ sons of bitches ever screaming

“I will fly over your meager Asian traffic

For I am an Obnoxious American with a flying car!”

You better pull me over for drunk flying

Cause I’m drunk on Freedom!

 

You want Green solutions to our problems?

Just tell people flying cars only run on bio fuel

Weird right?

If flying cars only ran on fuel made from corn

Iowa would become Saudi Arabia

 

Don’t ask don’t tell?

Don’t worry

Israel and Palestine

Will have to chill the eff out

The problems of the present

cannot interfere with the badssedness of the future

This is Americas promise

And who cares if it isn’t?

Americans like having something to brag about

Americas flying car

will become the worlds flying car

There will be no wings or propellers

Fuck that

I’m talking star wars shit

They’ll hover and have rockets

A flying  car named hope

And it’ll be friggin fast

 

President Obama

It’s been two long years

and you are still my motherfucker

But facts are facts

You could introduce a bill to congress

That gave every American citizen a free flag

And Republicans would vote no

Calling it job killing socialism

You could catch Osama Bin Laden

Challenge him to a kickboxing match

and  kill him with your bare hands

And Sarah Palin would still call you weak on terrorism

You could pray every day

And Glen Beck will still suck at life

But they all will get in line to buy a flying car

My god it’ll be beautiful

Now go into the White house video library,

Pop on a copy of Back to the Future 2 and take some notes

Because when you say progress

I think roads…where were going we don’t need roads.

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